From the Producer's Desk: Welcome to my World!
Yes, lately I've been wearing out my producer's hat. With so many
amazing artists and interesting projects, there's not enough time in
the day. Eventually it comes: the need for balance. The time to regroup,
breathe & leave space. To waste time and not just fill it. This is the way
back to my own most personal work.
Big thanks to my cousin Steve Mayone who drove up after a gig in
Boston recently, to spend the weekend laying down tracks for my next
solo CD, an almost forgotten, left by the wayside affair, put off on the
side of the road due to my scrambling efforts to recover from a divorce,
get back on my feet financially and stabilize enough to return to
my core focus. Why does it have to be so hard sometimes?
Who would divorce me, right? I look pretty nice. Just to make things
more exciting, I lost my voice. Oh, I know. I've been saying that about
my singing voice for a while, and you thought I was just being coy.
Actually, I have a degenerative neurological condition called S.D., or
Spasmodic Dysphonia. It was getting so bad last fall, I began to totally
freak out. I was fortunate enough to run across one of the premier
speech therapists who help people deal with this, on Youtube. On the
spot, I contacted her and scheduled a session with her. It was either
get help, or crawl into a hole and die.
So I dropped everything I was doing, and took three weeks to drive to
Atlanta, GA. I was able to finally get solid support and understanding for
this unbelievably difficult vocal issue, caused by deep-seated and long
standing emotional trauma, and made worse at every turn by fear &
the isolating effects of being unable to speak.
That is the mysterious crossroads where I find myself, sorely tested,
thankful to have work , coming to terms with my new voice, curious to
experiment with it. I accept that I'll likely never sing or speak
again in silken tones. But my voice reflects one person's journey
to unravel and uncover layers of sublimated abuse. Fly, ragged bird -
beyond the spotlight or the stage! Pray your wings take you to the
realm of the truth tellers, where you can tell an honest story.
I have many friends who keep showing up to help me do just that.
One in particular is songwriter & guitarist Val McCallum.
He lives in L.A. but spent a bunch of his childhood years in West Windsor,
Vermont, also known as Brownsville. I can say from first hand experience,
Brownsville has some magic, and a singular mountain in the middle of it.
The clans that hale from there carry a unique weight in the Vermont
music scene. It was my best friend musician Davey Davis born & raised
on Mt. Ascutney who introduced me to Val. What a great collaborator
I've found in Val. My new solo album features his playing, singing &
many of his production ideas. Our time in the studio together and
long distance working relationship has helped keep my creative light
alive.